Are You Pulling My Leg?

Written by Mike Awada on . Posted in Science, Social Media

Since the dawn of time, there have been cases of men and women being dissatisfied with their God-given height. The desire probably stems from our constant idolization of athletes, since the time of the gladiators. They can seemingly perform superhuman feats, and thus we strive to be able to as well. Being taller makes some people feel more important, powerful, and capable. Rapper Skee-Lo’s 1996 anthem exemplified the wish to grow for many.

When simply improving your posture isn’t good enough, you can get taller in a new way! A surgical limb-lengthening technique is being perfected in many regions of the world. Adding a couple of inches was really popular in China about a decade ago, but was banned in 2006 because of contiunuing botched attempts. To serve in the Chinese Military you had to be 5’7. Since the average male height in China was just under that mark, it’s easy to see why many people tried it.

Cosmetic limb-lengthening is available for individuals who suffer from height dysphoria; basically dissatisfaction and agony over your perceived height. To treat this issue, all you have to do is have both of your legs broken, and then have them slowly stretched! Once your legs are broken, a telescopic stretching rod is inserted into your cartilage, which stretches you about one millimeter per day. This is no joke. These are facts.

Similar to the human liver, bones have regenerative properties. Living bone actually grows in the gap of the break, increasing the length of your extremity. Not only that, muscles, nerves, arteries and skin also renew themselves along the new inches of your body.

In the United States, you can add anywhere from 3-6″ to yourself for about $85,000 (Which is down 25% from just five years ago). For that price, you could clean up an entire city park after you and 500 friends had lived and partied there for over a month.

The worst part of the process has got to be the fact that it is the patients responsibility to manually control the lengthening. Throughout the grueling physical therapy process, it’s up to you to twist your legs and extend the rod.

Is $85k too much for you? Just hop on a plane overseas where you can find a similar procedure, albeit a little more sketchy, for less than a quarter of the price! This article was inspired by a 37 year old gentleman residing in New York, who will be chronicling his transformation from 5’6″ to 6’0″. If you don’t have any other plans this evening, you can actually watch a special on him at 10 PM EST on ABC. Here’s a short clip about the getting taller process.

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As always, the topic brings up some interesting questions for debate. Do we need to be altering our body? Some would argue that getting braces, dying our hair, and wearing make-up is unnatural and shouldn’t be done. Should we just be happy with what God has given us? What are the consequences to unnatural altering of the human body? I guess that’s where they get the phrase, “To each his own.”


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Comments (8)

  • Kay

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    “Do we need to be altering our body?” That depends, if the alteration results in improved self-esteem and subsequently improved quality of life, who are we to judge? I am very grateful for all of the options we have and the continued medical advances which enhance and extend our lives.

    Reply

  • Lana

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    Are there surgeries out there that would effectively make a person shorter? Maybe, if everyone gets an operation, we can all be the exact same height! That would be neat… not….

    Reply

  • Trekkie

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    Ha ha! Lana, that is funny. Can’t we all just get along?

    Reply

  • Maven

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    That would be fine Lana if they made all of the men one height and all of the women another, of course it might hinder your ability to spot a friend in a crowd and then there is the issue of whether or not your feet and head matched your height, no one wants to be a pinhead.

    Reply

  • Mike

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    If they can lengthen your jimmy, why not your limbs? ;)

    Reply

  • Me

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    Ask a short person if the daily BS they get from the “talls” is worth the pain of having this procedure and they’d most likely say yes. I know, I know, “…but I’m not like that! I love short people!”. Yes, actually you are like that. The mockery of the short is pervasive and socially acceptable. Just turn on your TV and go to any channel and you will see it. The preference for tall is merely a social bias.

    Reply

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