Imagine the best sex of your life. Now, imagine it with a robot.
According to futurist website Transhumanity, SexBots will soon have the ability to provide us with “longevity orgasms,” which will surpass and exceed previously attainable levels of the human orgasm. In fact, these epically stimulating experiences could actually help to extend the human lifespan!
Numerous studies have explored the link between orgasms and health, however, this theoretically pending merger between previously fetishized “SexBots,” science, and health offers us an entirely new field of weirdness to consider not only in terms of our future robo-sexual encounters, but in terms of how those encounters might reshape our perceptions of human intimacy in the future.
SexBots: Look Younger, Live Longer
Sorry boys, but thus far there is no evidence as to a link between the male orgasm and lifespan. It does not seem to matter how often the male orgasm occurs, or how powerful that release might be; male ejaculation does not lead to a higher longevity rate. For my ladies, on the other hand, sex robots, or should I say SexBots (anyone in the sex robot community would assure you that it is very gauche not to abbreviate), can actually lengthen your lifespan.
According to “The Longevity Project,” a book detailing the findings of an eighty-year study of long-life factors, women with a higher frequency of orgasm during sex tend to lead longer lives. And SexBots are designed to provide exactly that: the most numerous, fulfilling, and nerve-shatteringly lasting orgasms possible.
According to Transhumanity, “SexBots will electrocute our flesh with climaxes thrice as gigantic because they’ll be more desirable, patient, eager, and altruistic than their ‘meat-bag’ competition, plus they’ll be uploaded with supreme sex-skills from millennia of erotic manuals, archives and academic experiments… their anatomy will feature sexplosive devices.”
Not only will SexBots will make you cum like never before, it will be good for you too! Studies have shown that orgasms reduce everything from stress to heart attacks. Other studies report that 2-3 orgasms per week can actually make us appear 7-12 years younger than we really are!
Rise of the Machines
So when will these mind-blowing orgasmitrons arrive on the market? Truth be told, their forefathers are already here. For roughly $2,000 to $7,000 dollars, Sexbot companies such as Truecompanion.com will go as far as to custom design your robotic partner, though many clients still claim that the SexBot is still more likely to move like RJD2 than a human being. Optimistic fetishists and tentatively realistic robotic engineers alike agree that by roughly 2050, sex robots will not only be prevalent in the first world, but that they will be nearly indistinguishable from humans.
The obvious concern is that SexBots will replace their ‘meat-bag’ human competition in every aspect of intimacy. For now, of course, we prefer to have sex with live partners, but thus far, none of the super advanced SexBots have made it as far as the consumer marketplace. Soon, however, it seems like the lifelike SexBots will be tough to resist.
What if the object of our lust has to work late? What if our partner is out of town for the weekend? Are we supposed to simply shoo away our libido because our lover had to visit Grandpa for the weekend? Think about it. Sexbots will never be too tired for sex. It won’t matter how their day was at work, or what time of the month it might be – they will always be down to get down. And hey, robo-sex is better than cheating, right?
I know, it is a terrifying concept at first; there are thousands of complications to worry about, along with innumerable technical difficulties that could lead to miscommunication or injury. What if Robo-Tarzan’s hearing mechanism malfunctions and he no longer understands the safe word? You could be screaming out ‘mango’… but Robo-Tarzan might only hear ‘tango’! That’s just one scenario, but I’m sure we can all think up a list of worst case scenarios.
An End to Prostitution?
Allow me to consider some of the positives apparent in this latest form of sexualized technological inundation. SexBots, thus far, have never been intended as more than complicated sexual toys. They will never inherit property or raise children; they will hopefully never even be programmed to make a grilled cheese sandwich! Despite these deliberately curtailed abilities, specialists have suggested that fifty-odd years down the road, Sexbots could provide an excellent alternative to human trafficking and forced prostitution.
According to Twoday Magazine, “Instead of kidnapping unwilling women and children… just get ROBOLOVER #223425 to take you on a journey you will never forget.” In fact, according to the Dominion Post, certain researchers at Victoria University have proposed a definitive rise in robotic prostitution by 2050.
At the end of the day, as I crawl into my robot-free bed, I have to conclude that I prefer it this way. Many scientists and specialists in Transhumanism are convinced of the merits of SexBots; and there are many, be they purely sexual or socio-economical, but it is still hard to imagine a future where robots are interchangeable with human partners.
To some degree, artificial intelligence has become so commercialized and profitable that lifelike SexBots are inevitable; if there is one thing that will never change about the human race, it is our obsession with sex. And so, whether we like it or not, a combination of capitalistic mentality, science, and Transhumanistic theory assures us that SexBots are bound to play a significant role in the future of our sexual encounters; perhaps, even in our lifespans!
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